Building the Nest

It seems it's time to start building the nest (the best we can in our one-bedroom apartment)! I dragged Keith to a baby store last week, not really thinking we'd buy anything there — maybe bedding — but just wanting to browse and admire the pretty furniture.

But then Keith says, "So, which of these do we like?" And suddenly we're seriously talking about buying one of these cribs and maybe also one of the awesome gliders. I had been assuming we'd buy a crib from Toys R Us or maybe Sears and that we'd skip the glider altogether and make do with the ugly black "leather" one we have in the living room. We've been in complete savings mode for so long (well, except for the TV Keith HAD to have last year, oh and let's not forget the PS3) that it was a bit shocking to consider spending so much more than we absolutely NEED to spend. But I have a bonus from work coming, and I'm working on a freelance project, and the extra income from those two things will more than cover what we're now thinking of spending. We quickly justified it.

So we inquire about one of the cribs, and the saleslady tells us it could take up to 12 weeks to come in. That puts us at the end of April. I'm due on May 11. Um, if we're going to do this we have to move fast!

But I feel like it's irresponsible to buy this stuff from the first place we looked at. I need to comparison shop! Men don't understand comparison shopping. Our conversation went something like this:

Keith: You like it? You think the price is okay? So let's buy it.

Me: But there might be something better and cheaper out there somewhere. You can't just buy from the first store you look at.

Keith: You've looked at other stores.

Me: Yes, but I wasn't looking with an eye to buy. Browsing is an entirely different kind of shopping.

Keith: [rolls eyes]

And so, on Thursday, while Keith's out with his buddies, I'm dragging my cousin back to a baby store I've already been to just so I can feel like I've comparison shopped. I'm about 90 percent sure the cribs and gliders at this store are much more expensive than the ones we're thinking of buying, but I need to look. Then Keith and I will go to place our order at the original store this weekend. LOL

Exciting stuff, huh? I'll post pictures after we've taken the plunge.

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Moving Moments

More and more I am feeling my little one move. It's endlessly fascinating and I can't get enough. The first time I felt something that I was sure was the baby was 21w5d. It was a faint tap, but it definitely caught my attention and I spent the rest of the day with my hand on my belly hoping to catch more. It's still very sporadic, though, with one day bringing lots of taps and bumps and the next day nothing.

My cat likes to sit on my belly and purr. I've been wondering if the baby can hear/feel the purring and what he thinks of it. Well, yesterday, when Austin was stretched out right across my belly, a warm weight that was purring up a storm, the baby kicked him! I don't think the cat felt it, but it made me laugh and I guess it answered my questions.

Here's my 24-week belly pic. This was the first day I wore a maternity shirt to work.



As you can see, I've changed my blog design yet again. This was my Saturday morning procrastination project. I really like this one, so I think I'll be leaving it alone for a good long while. I've finally added a blog roll (on the left) and my TTC and pregnancy journey (on the right). I'm liking the three-column layout. I'll try to post more frequently!

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Weight Matters

Warning: Anyone who doesn't want to read a pregnant woman's freakout about weight gain should turn back now. I know it's a tedious subject but I just need to let it out.

So. I had my 24-week appointment today (a little early). I have now gained 22 pounds. That's up nine pounds since December 22. Um, oops? Guess who went a little crazy over the holidays! I was doing so well, too. I felt good about being up 12.5 pounds at 20 weeks. But now? I'm trying not to freak out about it. It's really not so bad... right? If I gain a pound a week from here till the end, which I understand is normal and reasonable, I'll have gained 38 pounds. ... Okay, that's not making me feel better. The books all say that since I started out overweight, I should gain 15-25. I've obviously blown that goal right out of the water.

I've spent so much time during this pregnancy telling myself that weight doesn't matter and that I'm not going to stress about it. Whenever I complain to Keith that I look or feel fat, he says, "No, hunny, you're pregnant. There's a difference." I know.

I know.

But I've spent my whole life worrying about my weight. I was a chubby child teased by classmates. I remember getting dieting tips from my skinny, pretty best friend when I was nine years old. It was only a couple of years ago that I finally managed to shed some weight and started to feel kind of good about myself (although I was still a good 15 pounds from my stated goal). It's really hard to watch the scale swing back the other way. I especially didn't want to see it go past my all-time high, but it looks like it's going to.

Deep breaths. It's okay. It isn't forever. It's for the baby.

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21w4d

I had another level II anatomy scan today because the radiologist wasn't satisfied with the quality of the heart images from the first scan. The ultrasound doc felt this do-over was unnecessary — "You're wasting your time," he said — but good-naturedly said I should enjoy the chance to see the baby again. He confirmed with complete confidence that this is most definitely a boy.

We had the same problem as last time: the baby stubbornly kept his back to us so that the heart was difficult to see. The doctor spent a long time manipulating my belly and made me empty my bladder twice in hopes that he would move, but no dice. Finally the doctor got a shot he was satisfied with (I was on my side facing the wall and he was pushing upwards hard with the wand just above my pubic bone).

It's amazing how much the kid has grown. In just three weeks he has nearly doubled his weight and is now just a smidge under a pound. A pound! Tell me how it is possible that I still can't feel him moving around in there. I guess the anterior placenta combined with his apparent favoured position facing my spine conspire to muffle his movements, but still... he weighs a freaking pound! Any day now, right?

Here are some ultrasound pictures. Please excuse the quality of the reproductions; the first was scanned but the second is a photograph of the printout. You get the idea.

18w4d ~ cute!



21w4d ~ so much bigger! Doc said he was busy eating.

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So, it's 2009...

Our holidays have been pretty quiet. Keith's parents were away in Florida this year, so we celebrated with them early and I got to spend more time in my hometown with my family. Even there things were quieter than usual.

As for New Year's... Keith doesn't believe in New Year's, says it's just a made-up holiday with no real significance. Today is just Thursday. It sort of bothers me that he can be such a downer, but I suppose not celebrating NYE is no huge loss to me. I've never been a drinker or a partier, and whenever I tried to do something fun on NYE in my pre-Keith life, it was always a letdown.

Last night I dozed on Keith's shoulder until he woke me for the countdown. We shared a little kiss and went to bed. And so another year ends and a new one begins.

But even Mr. Party Pooper can't deny that 2009 is going to be a special year for us. After all, it's the year we're finally going to become parents! In a little over four months, we're going to meet and fall madly in love with our sweet son, and our lives will be forever changed. (Part of me is recoiling at the sappiness of that statement, but it's undeniably true.)

I wish the next year were clearer in other ways — so much is still up in the air — but it will come. Everything will eventually fall into place. Wish me patience.

I wish all of my readers love and peace and happiness in 2009. For those of you struggling to conceive or seeking alternative paths to build your families, I wish you the joy and satisfaction of finally achieving your goals.

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